Day 11 21 Days My Highest Potential HEALTHCARE

HEALTHCARE

Today, i am looking at the word HEALTHCARE

HEALTH  CARE

Provision for the maintenance of Health

Health being physical, mental and social well-being within the sound processing of information - expanding the meaning of words, thereby expanding our expression, and bridging a haven on earth

Day 11

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Bridging A Haven on Earth
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June's Website:
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Expanding Self-Expression, Expanding The Salad
What does Expanding The Word "Salad" Mean?
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-word-salad.html

What Christmas Really Mean

Expanding The Word "Salad"
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-word-salad.html
=

From

CR-eam

ST-eam

MAS-ticate

To 

CR-eate a haven on earth

ST-and for what is best for all

MAS-ter our Destiny

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What does Expanding The Word "Salad" Mean?
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2017/11/the-word-salad.html

The Word Poverty The Mind & Eating Disorder

Poverty The Mind and Eating Disorder




  Our determination to succeed is driven by our fear of being poor.

 We can see what is going on around us everyday and we see people dying in other parts of the world for lack of the basic necessities to survive. 

We can stop looking at the news but we know this is happening. We know we cannot fool ourselves for long. 

We know this is something we need to address. We do not know how to address this as in our mind this seems to be a "big problem", so we try to blame others and instead of taking this on, we hope that one day someone will wave a magic wand and there will be some magic - that will make this end. 

We sit in front of our computer, we eat food with friends and family, we shop until we drop, we listen to the kind of music we like and we watch the kind of movies we watch. 

For a moment we think everything is better. 

But after a while, one day when we are alone we are faced with the same mind chatter. So we do the same things we do to make ourselves believe "everything is okay". The media creates a jingle similar to that, so we really think everything is better - that our lives changed.

We go on living our lives. We find more friends to eat with and more tasty foods to eat. We feel happy for a moment but we are getting fat.

We stop eating "butter" and stop eating rice.
We try eating the food we think is healthy. 

We succeed for a while but we reach a breaking point.

We eat and binge so these things we suppressed in our mind will go away and believe they will be solved, but the more we eat, the more we get fat, and the more we become sick.

We try to control this by changing our diet or becoming a "health guru". Our business is making money after we spent so much money to learn to do the business part of it. We feel happy for a moment.

We try to do yoga and meditation to suppress our memories of pain and failure. The mind keeps quiet for several hours and because this is a form of mind control, we have to do it again and again so we will feel the limited peace inside our mind.

When we stop the lifestyle modification, meditation, stress release techniques, breath control, exercise, diet etc. , the mind chatter and stress resumes and the DIS-EASE (discomfort) appears.

 We as individuals, perceived as having our own I DENT(DENT-ure) TI  (I-nformation T-echnology) TY and groups that we identify as separate from other groups are perceived separate from the WHOLE - that is life. 

How can we have lasting peace (piece) when we are a piece that is missing in the whole puzzle?

MEANING

Me as AN ING-redient 

Join me
Let us bridge a haven on earth, where all of us will have the basic necessities to survive for real.

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Bridging Heaven On Earth: Eating

Eating Is About Realizing That 

What We Eat - as  Animals and Plants Have Nutrition from the Earth

That Supports The Physical Body

Let Us Eat With That Awareness

- June Roca

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Redefining Eating Intro

Practical Life On Earth And Bridging Heaven On Earth
http://bridgingheavenonearth.com

Eating

Related Blogs

SF
Eating Saying Thank You to Mom
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2016/04/self-forgiveness-for-using-eating-other_4.html

Eating When Hungry For Affection
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2016/04/eating-when-hungry-for-affection-etc.html
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Where i grew up,  when we visited the house of a relative or friend, they normally serve us something - biscuits, noodles, fruit salad, soda, rice cakes etc. - whatever they have in their kitchen.

I liked food that's native to where I was born and food that tastes good - with exotic flavor combinations. When  eating these kinds of foods with  my friends and relatives, plus an abundance of laughter and stories about others, I felt happy.

If I was not offered food and there was no laughter and stories around the table where food is served, I felt the day was ordinary.

When we visited people who were poor and they did not offer us anything, not only do we make fun of the situation or pity those people but they themselves apologize for not having any food in their house and not serving us anything when we visit.

It is interesting to note that the town where i grew up in survives or gets its sole income from  people cooking food to sell in the market. It is a very small fishing village in the Philippines.

So in this blog, I will look at the word 'eating',  its dictionary meaning, phonetics and I will also forgive myself for causing stress within my body for the rise and fall of feelings and emotions around the subject of 'eating'. Then, I will redefine the word to live it.

Eating When Hungry for Affection Etc.

Blog

Eating To Say 'Thank You Mom'

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2016/04/self-forgiveness-for-using-eating-other_4.html

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Eating food is being used for so many reasons, aside for the reason it was intended to be used - to nourish the body.

This blog is me saying 'I am sorry to myself' for using 'eating' other than what it is used for.  So below, I am going to forgive myself.

My Self-forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am hungry for affection.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am hungry for attention.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am stressed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I do not know the solution to my problem.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am excited.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am sad.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am happy.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat because it is a habit that I formed.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat because I am alone.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am nervous.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am bored. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to eat when I am uncertain of whether to do or not to do something.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to 
eat when I want to have a break from working in the internet.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go to the kitchen and open the door of the refrigerator even when the body does not need nourishment - but as a habit.

Eating To Say 'Thank You Mom'

Blog

Eating When Hungry For Affection

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2016/04/eating-when-hungry-for-affection-etc.html

Eating Saying Thank You to Mom
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2016/04/self-forgiveness-for-using-eating-other_4.html
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This blog is about me redefining the word 'Eating'. 

*Self-forgiveness is about me releasing the subjective interpretations i have to the word.

Self-forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that have accepted and allowed myself to say thank you to my mom for cooking my favorite food by eating a lot of it instead of just saying 'Thank you' to my mom and using food that she cooked to nourish the body.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to copy others where when they eat, I also want to eat believing that it is better to eat with someone than when I am alone. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am a spoil sport when I do not eat in events.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I am unaware of - when I am hungry, instead of seeing and realizing i have abused my body by eating when I am not hungry to entertain myself that this is a consequence outflow of that.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire new tastes in food rather than use food to nourish the body and be here to enjoy its taste.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to impose on the body by tasting new or exotic food and eventually eating it for entertainment's sake rather than for nourishment.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I do not know how to communicate with my body rather than see realize and understand it is my body and that I have to develop an equal and one relationship to it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I do not know how much I should eat of each food item that goes inside my mouth rather than test to figure it out.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i cannot trust what i see in my muscle testing.
Within this,
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that muscle testing is guesswork.
Within this,
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that with muscle testing there is no certainty.

I forgive myself that I have a accepted and allowed myself to blame my mom for leaving the food on the table all the time for all to eat.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe eating is a pastime, a source of entertainment, happiness, and fun, rather than a source of nutrition.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that I should know how to cook so I can cook and eat nice tasting food and also so my ex-husband and my kids can have nice tasting food so we can all be entertained by food rather than be nourished by it.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire the praise of others when they eat what i cook instead of cooking to nourish the body and other's body.

Living My Utmost Potential 19: Craving Part 2: Speech

'I Need To Use Body Movements' Mind Pattern

>I need to explain this concept 

>so I need to show it using body movements 

>as my visual aids 

Here, there's an idea of how I should present the topic based on information given by others.

Links To Realizing and Living My Utmost Potential

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-desteni-of-living-my-declaration-of_30.html

Self-forgiveness to follow

Living My Utmost Potential 18: The Way of Food Preparation: Speech

Talking about Food Preparation and how we use food.

Links To Realizing and Living My Utmost Potential

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-desteni-of-living-my-declaration-of_30.html

Mind Pattern:

>I need to challenge the audience

>because this will make me look like a powerful speaker

Self-forgiveness to follow

Day 1: The Word 'Hey' 21 Day Investigation On Words and Behavior

June's Blog About The Word 'Hey'

Day 1
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/08/day-1-word-hey-21-day-investigation-on.html
Day 2

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/08/day-2-mind-patterns-mind-interpretations.html
Day 3
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/08/the-persona-as-mind-is-it-real-21-day.html

Video Introduction:

21 Day Word and Behavior Investigation

Word: 
'Hey'

1.
Someone who's a stranger calling me 'hey'

Thought:
Don't Call me 'hey', call me by my name,  June
Picture: A Stranger calling me

Mind Pattern
>don't call me 'hey', call me by my name,  June
>why is he calling me hey?
>I got to tell him to call me by my name
>but that's a tic

Behavior:
Turn my head my eyes looking at the person where the sound came from

===
2.

If someone tell me 'hey you!', here's what goes on in my mind
My Thought: F__k! what did I do?
Picture In My Mind: caught

Mind Pattern:

> F__k! what did I do?
>did I do anything wrong?
>why is he calling me?



Behavior:

Looking up and at the person calling me out, holding my breath
(perceiving danger of being humiliated, so thinking about how to get out of the situation by lying/correcting what I did through reasoning and then exposing/blaming the other person



To be continued.
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Leon's Blog About the Word 'Hey'

Day 1

http://leonperry.blogspot.com/2014/08/day-1-hey-21-day-mind-investigation-on.html

Day 2

http://leonperry.blogspot.com/2014/08/day-2-hey-sf-21-day-mind-investigation.html

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Life Support: Living Principles

Realizing and Living My Utmost Potential

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-desteni-of-living-my-declaration-of_30.html

Website: www.budsoflife.org

Day 19 'I Like To Eat Too' 21 Days Mind Investigation On Sugar

21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

http://budsoflife.org/sf-sugar

Physical  Support

Awareness of How Much Sugar We Take: The Sugar Log Project

http://sugarlog.budsoflife.org/

Physical Support

My Food and Recipes Blog
Relationship Support: Blogging with Partner
Leon's (My husband) 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar Blogs
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Life Support
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DAILY NEWS Atlanta San Francisco, USA, Sydney, Australia and Cebu Philippines
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This Blog Is About:

Wanting to eat when someone is eating

Mind Pattern

>you will get some food to eat? 

>I like to eat too 

>let me get some food too

>what do you have there? 

>that is delicious 

What's the fear?

Fear of not eating when someone is eating

What is Self-forgiveness?

It is the process by which an individual forgives oneself for accepting and allowing self to separate from objective reality, releasing positive and negative value judgments such as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative - as subjective interpretations of reality regarding something or someone that leads to stability as breath. 

Writing Self-forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear NOT eating when my relatives or my friends are eating believing that i will miss out on the taste of food being eaten and the camaraderie, so desires to eat when someone is eating where i attached a memory of when i was young to this fear - the memory of a guest attending a family event refusing to eat saying 'thank you, but I just ate', where my mom and my grandmother usually say, 'no just eat a little bit. I will be angry with you if you do not eat.I cooked this
meal because i know you are coming'.

I saw how the guests would force themselves to eat to please the host and everyone would be happy with that.

Commitment To Correct Myself

I commit myself to when and as I see myself fearing not eating when one is eating - I stop myself from acting out this past experience into the present driven by fear - I slow myself down as breathe realizing that the mind thinks fast and acts fast specially with regards to eating food that i defined as delicious and tasty, So, I direct myself as the physical breath to slow myself down as i decide to not follow this eating drive to jump into the 'superhighway of the mind', breathing through the aroma of the food, rather than being driven by it and becoming disempowered - to then empower myself to remain here as breath and eat that which will practically nourish the body.

I commit myself to when and as i see myself being driven  by desire to eat to please others or because of the smell of food that others are eating - I stop myself from following my mind's desire - I breathe through the desire, releasing it, to rather than disempower myself, by being a slave to my desire, empower myself to eat from the starting point of providing food that nourish the body.

I commit myself to expand and redefine the word 'eat' - and give it a definition that I can live as living words

Why am I expanding or redefining words?

Words are like microchips that has in it for example, thoughts, imaginations etc. that is an interpretation of reality in our mind. It is defined within what is best for us, as individuals, which is based on competition within survival of the fittest . So, in expanding or redefining a word our goal is to align its meaning to what the word is in physical reality - which is mutually beneficial for all of us, humans, plants, animals etc. as it is what the word is, realizing that we can forgive ourselves for the meaning we gave it and correct ourselves - giving it a meaning we can live and express ourselves as, in physical reality that aligns to what is best for all -  as Living Words.

Word Web

Eat

take in solid food

Expanding on the word 'Eat'

take in solid food 

-

Eating has become a pastime for us and food lost its meaning. The food that we eat becomes entertainment for the tongue. Food has to nourish the body. We have to bring it back to a point where food is being used to give nourishment for the body- taking in solid food that support the body to survive optimally.

Phonetics

From

E-nergy A-llowed to T-read where the body's nourishment is compromised

To

E-ngage A-ll Together (different food items) in providing food to nourish the body

Pork Roast: Gravy or No Gravy 2 Day 230 :The Mind: Fears: Survival

Journey To Life  Blogs  

  

About Writing/Blogging

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SELF-FORGIVENESS

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My Food and Nutrition Blog Site:

http://foodandnutritionjunejourneytolife.blogspot.com/

The Mathematics of Life  
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In this blog i am looking at who i have become within a decision i made  and the fears that i saw within that

Event:: X-mas gathering with my partner's family
Decision: Make a gravy out of pan drippings and serve it with the pork roast

My partner's decision: Leave the pan drippings as it is - do not make a gravy

I will use self-forgiveness in this blog for fears i saw and continue from Part 1.
I highlighted the Fears i will do self-forgiveness for in this blog, below

I am doing self-commitment in blogs to come and live the correction in my breath by breath movement to birth me here as life.


Fears behind the decision to make a gravy:
Fear of the texture of the gravy (using pan drippings as gravy) not being 'right' as per the culinary standards/rules
↓
Fear of  being a bad chef
↓
Fear of not being popular
↓
Fear of not being liked by my partner's family when i bring a pork roast with a thin, runny gravy
↓
Fear of being alone ↓
Fear of being bored by being just by myself
↓
Fear of going crazy
↓
Fear of being in a mental institution
↓
Fear of not being in control
↓
Fear of being bad
↓ Fear of hurting/killing others
↓
Fear of being in prison
↓
Fear of not having the freedom to live life and not do what I like
↓
Fear of being sad
↓
Fear of wasting my time on Earth
                                                                                                                 Mind Loop
↓
Fear of REGRETTING the way i lived my life
↓
Fear that I did not use the time that I had to live life fully
↓
Fear of blaming myself that I did not live life fully
↓
Fear of feeling guilty
↓
Fear of doing something to make up for it
↓
Fear of starting from the beginning again/reincarnating
↓
Fear of being in a loop and not getting the whole point of what life is about
↓
Fear of not knowing who, what, where, when, how I am
↓
Fear of not doing what is needed of me to be who I am as life
                                                                                                                     Mind Loop  
↓
Fear of REGRETTING living my life the way i did
↓
Fear of not being someone who is happy all the time
↓
Fear of going through a longer process
↓
Fear of not enjoying the fruits of life fully while lived

↓

Fear of eternal pain/suffering

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Self-forgiveness Statements  Continued:

Fear of hurting/killing others
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself 'as fear of not surviving - as the physical/body'
to fear hurting/killing others fearing believing i will be ending someone's life on earth - believing it is bad -not realizing that the body/physical just changes its form and that good and bad are part of morality imposed by society to prevent people from causing others harm - not realizing that 'what we resist persist' - not realizing it is not about

Fear of being in prison
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself 'as fear of not surviving - as space and time'
to fear being in prison fearing being secluded from the rest of the world - believing prison is a location separate from HERE - not realizing that i trapped myself within space and time seeing through my mind's eyes and defining space within longitudes and latitudes - defining time within past present and future - not realizing that i am here - HERE - as the current state or condition of/as ALL that is physical in/as in every moment of breath. 

Fear of not having the freedom to live life and not do what I like
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself 'as fear of not surviving - as mind/energy'
to fear not doing what i like and not living life - defined by what i like to do as who i have become as the mind -  not realizing that my starting point as who i am in what i do, matter - and that my idea of living life in bliss and happiness - as i desire a positive energy experience in living life- is just an idea i made up in my mind
as i fear the opposite polarity - which is being sad - not realizing that enjoying me HERE as how the physical  is expressing itself and enjoying the in-breath and the out-breath and  the 'holding moment' is enjoying me as who i am here

Fear of being sad
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself 'as fear of not surviving - as mind/ energy'
to fear being sad believing when i cannot do what i like i will be unhappy and sad - within this, running away from a negative energy experience wanting/desiring to be eternally happy - wanting a positive energy experience as the mind- not realizing that who i am is not defined by energy as positive and negative energy experiences rather, who i am is here enjoying me as breath - being with my heartbeat as the pulse of life as the physical 

Fear of wasting my time on Earth
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself 'as fear of not surviving- as space and time' to fear living in prison believing it is a waste of my time on earth - where my idea of living life fully as time on earth is having a happy life doing the good things i believed i am supposed to do -from birth to death - as memory - as desiring positive energy experiences within the unfolding events from the point of birth to a point of death- fearing negative energy experiences - fearing suffering, fearing pain and fearing difficulty- trapped in time - not realizing i am here in every moment of breath as self-remembrance
                                                                                                        
Fear of REGRETTING the way i lived my life
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself  'as fear of not surviving - as a divine being '
to fear looking back after death - regretting the way i lived my life - believing that life is supposed to be spent helping the people that needs help and being a self-realized being - is what it means to live life fully - believing that if i will not be able to do this,  my entire life on earth will be wasted - not realizing that helping others to have eternal life is from a starting point of separation from all  within self-interest and desiring or doing something to be self-realized is  from a starting point of separation from all life' 
- not realizing that stopping mind participation as i am here as breath in every moment is the commonsensical thing to do
 - not realizing that assisting in establishing a world that truly honors life - based on equality, standing for what is best for all  - is what it means to really live

21 Days Breathing: Solution Blueprint1 Part 8 Day 6 Raw Food, Blogging: 9-9-2012 JTL Blog Day 148

My Animal Blogs:

 

About Writing/Blogging

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Store

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SELF-FORGIVENESS

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21 Days Breathing

Daily Blogs

http://juneroca.com/my-process/the-21-days-breathing/

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This is a continuation of this Blog:
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-breath-21-days-breathing-part-7-day.html

Yesterday i wrote in my blog commitment statement that i will do a routine of things i am doing for the day as self-corrective application for my 'late' character - to do breath by breath - to equalize myself with the world system - and direct myself in my 'without' . Here's what i did - i list the things i need to do. Normally i would be pushing myself to do things by writing  the time i will do it and what i will do for the day. I realised i am directed by the mind that way.

 I am directing me here as the breath - to do what needs to be done breath by breath and correct myself as i go.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that breath by breath walking is separate from time - not realizing and understanding that time is the accumulation of breaths. I commit myself to assist myself to accept and allow myself to birth me as the breath here.

Solution Blueprint: 
Routine 
To do Breath by Breath

Here's My List for Sept. 9, 2012
/ Shower - body - *do self -forgiveness and self correct when thoughts or backchats come up in the shower
/ Stretch - body - *as the breath - let go of knowledge and information about the body and how to stretch it - as i see the body physically 'asks' for it.

/ Blog- blogs - late after 12 am
x Assignment

x Tweepie
x Delete Members of Groups

/ Chop Carrots, Process in the food processor and dehydrate Raw Bread and taco shells

x Website
x Raw Food Recipe Book

x/ Study the Driving Course - a little bit

/ Go to store  to get food items to prepare food for tomorrow - waiting for CB to answer text of when to deliver - *He txted- went to the store and got the food items for next day delivery

/ Listen to interviews - *Be Here when listening to the interviews
Whale 4

/ Move as the breath in every moment - most of the breaths

/ Sweep Floor
/ Wipe Floor

/ Chat with Equality Friends

/ Make Bed
/ Rate

/ Relax the Body - let go of separation from breath * most of the day
/ Speak My SF for Thoughts - Let go of separation from thoughts * some
/ Be Here as Breath - *most
/ Let go of separation from body movements *most
/ Support Body Through posture *most

Read JTL Blogs -
/ H *2nd to last
/ C
x  E

x Do JTL Video

/ Write What I Eat and Drink
Writing what i ate for the day:
/Ate  1 mango during the day and 1 meal at night *quinoa salad with arugula

Watch movie with my partner
Sleep
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To Continue Correcting Myself Breath by Breath

*
I started the day by listing the things i will do breath by breath
Then having a Shower and then Stretching - letting go of beliefs on how to do it but movement as breath here
The self massage i did by just touching my body and pressing it lightly with some gliding strokes  - as i am here as breath
The body's movement is unrestricted

The Breath: 21 days Breathing Part 7 Day 5 When Am i Holding my Breath? SF JTL Blog Day 147

 

About Writing/Blogging

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Store

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SELF-FORGIVENESS

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This Blog Is A Continuation of These Blogs:

http://juneroca.com/my-process/tantrik-yogi-character/

I wrote 2 animal blogs, for Day 5:
Elephant's Message To Humans
http://animalsjunejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-elephant-message-to-humans-day-2.html
The Elephant's Way:
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-way-of-elephant-zen-buddhist-yogi.html

Continuation of Day 1 Thoughts Self-forgiveness
This is My 21 Days Breathing Blog for Day 5

Self-forgiveness for Holding My Breath While:

6. Correcting my blog - the 'Pity as Help' Character
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to process information within my mind - when i edit a blog - in an alternate reality where i sift through memories as pictures and separate from what is here - as the physical - so i commit myself to when and as i see myself do this - i stop - i breath and realise that i am here looking at the blog - which is written information that i wrote as i look at who i have become walking through my mind - self-forgiving thoughts, backchats, internal conversations etc. - so assist myself to bring the event here and look at it and put in the omitted words or phrases - as i look at and edit my blog - slowing myself down, supporting me as the body - as the breath in every moment here.

7.Editing the arrows in my assignment
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to when i arrange the arrows in my assignment 
Ex.
--->
----->
------>
- when i am late in submitting it - separate from the physical - where I react with 'impatience' through my mind - separating from what is here - as the physical - so i commit myself to when and as i see myself doing this - i stop- i breathe. I realise that i become overwhelmed by looking at details that is repeated over and over again - defining myself within the 'overwhelmed by details - repeating - impatient' character - so i commit myself to when and as i see myself doing this - i stop - i breathe, I realise that when i repeatedly do something the same that increase in increments of 1 as the hyphens within the arrows (----> ) - it makes me impatient because it does not give me a positive energy experience - as i see this as a neutral experience - and increasing in increments of one. does not take me within/as my mind where i can have some positive energy experience - rather it makes me see what is here - the arrows being a combination of symbols -a physical manifestation - 2 symbols, a hyphen and an arrow pointing to the right at the end - the hyphen or series of lines (-)  that increase as i progress through the timeline in my DIP assignment -  so the mind does not generate energy that will give life to it - the impatience being a reaction in my relationship to the mind 'within' and which i externalize as i deal with others in the external world which is the same reaction that i had 'within'- this time externalizing it as a reaction in my relationship with the world system 'without' as i talk to employees working for my phone carrier - where i become impatient - when what i do not hear what i want to hear in that moment - defining myself within the 'impatient - paying bill' character - as i need an answer that can get me out of a big bill or a where i am in a hurry - fearing being late -defining myself within the 'fear being late' character - as i fear being fined for paying late - defining myself within the 'fear of being fined - late' character - as i become impatient and my heart beats faster - and my fore finger and thumb rubbing my chin - while my neck turns left and right gasping a big breath - my voice high pitched - saying words that will make me superior - defining myself within the ' late - desire to be superior 'as i feel inferior at that moment - defining myself within the 'late - inferior' character - as i am late paying and wanting or desiring to get out of  trouble - defining myself within the 'i want to get out of trouble - help me' character 

-a similar event that i witnessed when i was young as i see my mom and my grandmother react with impatience when we're late to church, late for an event, late in paying bills - as my grandmother pouts and stares the way i do - defining myself within the 'annoyed me annoyed grandmother- copy' character  - where in that moment i separate from what is here - my body manipulated by me as the mind to positions expressing 'fear' and 'impatience' -  as a reaction in my relationship to the mind -  manifested in the physical - manipulating the body  to move to express a reaction from within/as my mind - which is not what is best for all - as the mind is taking the nutrients needed by the body to function - transforming physicality to energy to be used by the mind - as i react to pictures, words etc. 'within' - through the mind - and people, pictures, words etc. in 'my without' - the world system - so assisting myself to be the breath in every moment here - by being self-directive - and make a routine where i can do what i have set myself to do for how many breaths i have on this earth - so i will not play out these characters - slooooow myself down - support my body breath by breath moment by moment.