Tao of Food Preparation Recipes

Tao of Food Preparation Recipes
'Living' E-book

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

'Mathematics: Numbers as Me : Day 203 'I Don't Care About Mathematics'



 
===
This Blog Is A Continuation of These Blogs:
The Word 'Mathematics'
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/the-word-mathematics-day-202.html

He's Good At Mathematics
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/11/mathematics-hes-good-at-mathematics-my.html



In this blog, i am doing self-forgiveness for not being aware of what math is - as the mind,  believing it is not easy/difficult and my desire to study subjects  that will eventually give me a lot of money to survive in this world -running away from studying mathematics - fearing it is too difficult for me to understand, and fearing to not get a high earning job if i learn mathematics - thus not caring about who i am as equal to mathematics - as numbers - as symbols - as manifestations that is equal to all that is here.

'I Do Not Care' About Math: Money: Blame
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not care to study mathematics believing it will not give me money to survive later on in life  - as who i have become as the mind within self-interest and survival - thus, it is the evil me,  not deciding from a point of what is best for all, but what is best for me, i and myself - blaming the physical universe for not giving me opportunity to have enough money to learn what i need to learn (like learning mathematics) - making the excuse that i cannot study math because i have to survive in this world - justifying that by saying i need to focus more on spirituality so i can be liberated from the ego - so i can be whole - believing that focusing on math is mundane and will not give me liberation from the ego - not seeing and realizing that i am here as equal to the numbers and mathematical symbols, equations etc. as manifestations - that is part of life - as who i am as all life.



Not Being Aware of The Use of What  Mathematics is
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i do not know what math is - as i exist within/as mind awareness of what i can see within what my eyes allow me to see, limited by my definition of words based on polarity as i connect and defined the word mathematics to/within other words separating from it through charging it with a positive or a negative value - not seeing and realizing and understanding what real awareness is - as who i am as all that is here as equal to/as all life - as all manifestations - equal to who i am.

Judging Math as Difficult
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to judge mathematics as difficult - believing that those subjects that are difficult for me to understand will give me suffering - fearing suffering, believing that it takes too much time and effort to understand it - fearing losing time as it is also losing money - within me trying to survive - not seeing and realizing that that is me as the mind within fear of suffering and fear of death - believing that if i continue being stupid and not understanding math i will not exist and survive as the 'happy' character that i desire to become.




Science as 'Better Than' Math
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to compare math to science - judging science as more interesting than math - believing that flowers grow and animals move - while numbers do not move - so defined it within a 'negative energy experience' - judging numbers as boring as they cannot give me a 'positive energetic experience' similar to when i see a flower grow - similar to the 'positive energy experience' i get when i smell the flowers like rose and jasmine- as numbers do not grow nor do they have a smell - as i have judged those manifestations that move as better than those that does not move - as who i have become as the mind defined by 'positive energetic experiences'.



'I Don't Care' as Laziness 
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to be lazy  to learn to study mathematics and  not care about mathematics - as numbers - as symbols and not seeing and realizing how these symbols are equal to all the manifestations - as who i am - as all  life

===

Commitments
Correcting Myself

I commit myself to when and as i see myself fearing studying mathematics - believing it is difficult - and fearing/avoiding  the 'negative energy experience' of when i study math - i stop - i breathe.

I realize that mathematics as numbers as symbols - is a tool for me to use in my living expression - so instead of fearing looking at mathematics, as numbers as symbols, to redefine it - so i can use it as equal to my expression - as a part of/as  the whole - as all life

I assist myself to accept and allow myself to instead of having an 'energetic relationship' with mathematics - as numbers - as symbols - separate from me - charging it with a positive and a negative value - perceived as more than or less than who i am - i assist myself to accept and allow myself to establish an equal and one relationship with mathematics - as numbers - as symbols - equal to/as all manifestations that is here - as all life - equal to who i am.

I commit myself to when and as i see myself comparing  those manifestations that move with those manifestations that does not move - i stop - i breathe - to instead of comparing those manifestations that move to those that does not move - i assist myself to see that i am designing competition within comparison, judgment and jealousy - within me wanting to make sense of what i see as the mind - with a limited awareness as mind awareness - separate from all that is here - i assist myself to forgive the limitations i imposed on myself and correct myself in my living application - to accept and allow myself to have a real awareness of who i am as equal to manifestations that move and does not move - as all manifestations - moving or not moving are parts of this one life - and to simply live as who i am as equal to all that is here.

I commit myself to when and as i see myself believing that mathematics is mundane and spirituality as something that can liberate me from my ego - and so being lazy to study mathematics - i stop - i breathe

I realized that as i run away from my fear of suffering/death/not existing  - i desire the easy way out - through spirituality and the 'promise of divine bliss' - which one day - i have to face and take self-responsibility for - rather, take self-responsibility at the moment it presents itself so as not to accumulate consequence to a point of 'too lateness' - where the body's role within my accepting and allowing this in my world is not being looked at - as me not caring,  to what happens to the body, as the evil me only interested in my own survival as the mind - 'unaware' that the body is being resourced for energy for the mind to exist- and nutrients being transformed to energy so i can have a 'positive energy experience'

So, i assist myself to look at how i created my mind -so i can forgive and release myself from my desires etc. and birth myself here using self-forgiveness and self-corrective application - and as i do that birth a world that truly honors life based on equality

No comments:

Post a Comment

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Share This