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I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to conceive of and look for eternal love within Christianity - as eternal salvation in heaven - as i pray to Jesus - believing that establishing a relationship with him will bring me to heaven believing there is eternal love in heaven when i cannot as a human being, even have an actual equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - the physical body - as the evil me pushing the physical aside in favor of a 'positive energy experience'
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to conceive of and look for eternal love -as liberation from the ego - within the AM organization - believing that my guru Anandamurti is going to give me that - liberation from the ego - when i do everything that he said i have to do - yoga exercises, meditation, group meditation, a sentient diet etc.when i was doing yoga and meditation - not realizing that i created my 'within' and 'without' - so as the architect of the creation of my world, i am the one that can demolish/stop what i created - and look at my desire for eternal love - when i cannot as a human being even have an equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - my physical body - as the evil me pushing the physical aside in favor of a 'positive energy experience' within my desire for eternal love.
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to conceive of and look for eternal peace within Zen Buddhism - believing that watching my breath will give me eternal peace when i cannot as a human being have an equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love with 'Paramapurusa/God' when i cannot as a human being even have and equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to conceive of, and look for eternal love within my 'past' realtionship with DSS - when i cannot even as a human being have an actual equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - that i cannot even have an equal and one relationship to my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DST when i cannot even as a human being have an equal and one relationship with that which is closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my 'past' relationship with DJW - when i cannot even as a human being have an actual equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DMC - when i cannot even as a human being have an actual equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DRD when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closes to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with
DZB when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DGL when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DLP when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DAR when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DBR when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DVS when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with time when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with Anandamurti when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - the physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DASJ when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closes to me - my physical body
I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to look for eternal love within my relationship with DEM when i cannot even have an equal and one relationship with that closest to me - my physical body
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Commitment to Correction
I commit myself to when and as i see myself wanting to have 'eternal love', within establishing a relationship with others - I stop - I breathe
To instead of desiring eternal love within not wanting to face my fear of not existing, fear of suffering, fear of death, fear of pain etc., look at establishing a real relationship with the body, within/as the breath, and bring myself back here in the physical, - to instead of wanting 'Etenal Love',
Redefine 'ETERNAL' as E-nergy TER-minated birthing a N-ew c-A-rnal /body/physical awareness as all L-ifel
Realizing that the my body is equal to the body of plants, equal to the body of nature, equal to the body of animals etc.
As all came from the same substance all are made of
and redefine 'LOVE' as an emotion
to real 'LOVE'
which is standing for what is best for All Life
and instead of me 'NOT CARING' for the body, looking at the word 'care' as i have used it as who i have become as CA-ging someone in ones R-elationship to E-nergy
to establish an equal and one relationship with the body, with the person
Redefining the word 'Care' as C-arrying someone A-s oneself R-eversing E-nergy, and putting ones shoes in another's shoes - walking in the other's shoes as oneself, being patient, and bringing back to oneself what one has seen as one walks with/as another, realizing that - that someone is bringing to ones attention ones points and mirroring it back to oneself, so one can take self-responsibility to birth oneself as life - correct ones application within that and be ready to breath by breath show the other what one saw and how one corrected oneself, so the other can see and correct oneself also.
To through writing, self-forgiveness, and commitment to correct myself, breath by breath, moment by moment, assist myself to stop desiring to instead face my fears
To birth me here as all LIFE, so within that, birth a World that truly honors life
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