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Saturday, December 14, 2013

The Story of Sonia: Christmas, The Mind Pattern of Giving,The Word Help and Survival

In the News:

Pinay who inspired Cannes film now living in poverty

'Auntie Terry' to attend premiere of 'Ilo Ilo' in Singapore

MANILA - The Filipina domestic helper who inspired the Cannes-winning film "Ilo Ilo" is set to attend the premiere of the movie in Singapore on August 29.
Teresita "Auntie Terry" Sajonia was recently visited by Singaporean director Anthony Chen in San Miguel, Iloilo, together with his younger brother, Christopher.
Sajonia took care of Chen and his brothers 16 years ago.
An article published in Singapore's Chinese-language newspaper Lianhe Zaobao reported how Sajonia, 56, is now living in poverty and has been neglected by the relatives she used to help financially when she was still a domestic helper.

The Word Web's definition of the word 'Help' is:
Give help or assistance; be of service

This definition of this word is being used in the Philippine scene:

Most Filipinos give help or assistance to family when one feels guilty that one did not help as much as one could because one did not have the means/money to help when one was barely surviving in the Philippines, so when one gets a good paying job abroad one gives gifts in the form of money, education etc. to ones relatives then has the illusion that one has transcended ones guilt, so feels good about oneself. But when one loses that good paying job and asks for help in turn from the people they have helped in the past, and gets rejected, then they go into regret. They regret having helped that person and blames oneself for helping them in the first place.

Here's the Mind Pattern

>one is Poor and does not have much money to survive let alone give gifts
>one cannot give gifts to relatives
>one feels bad
>one strengthens ones resolve to earn more money
> one becomes wealthy
>one gives gifts to poor relatives and friends
>one feels good 
>one feels 'useful' and 'powerful'
>one loses job and money
>one feels 'useless and powerless'
>one asks help from ones relatives
>no one gives help
>one goes into regret that one helped and blame the persons one helped
>one lives in poverty and hope that we become wealthy and rich one day
>one is given help or one finds another job that pays good money
>one give gifts to family and friends
>one loses ones job again

The pattern repeats itself

During Christmas, this is the pattern that plays out, just a little bit different:. let's have a look:

>Its Christmas
>one buys gifts
>one feels good about giving gifts to relatives and friends
>one feels 'powerful' and 'useful'
>After Christmas, we look at the expenses we incurred in giving gifts
>we realized we overspent
>one saw ones credit card debt is too much
>one decides to repay the credit card company every month
>one loses job
>one feels 'useless and powerless'
>one decides not to pay the credit card debts because one does not have the money to pay
>one realize no one is going to lend one money if one do not have a credit line nor a job
>one regrets spending so much money in gifts
>one works hard in replenishing the money in the dwindling bank account
>Christmas comes again
>one gives gifts again
>one loses ones job again

The pattern repeats itself

The story of the Filipina overseas worker above is our own story of survival which we repeat again and again during Christmas, when we give to charity etc.

In a world that does not honor all life, there's the 'haves' and the 'have-nots'. There's the ones who can afford to give and the ones waiting for gifts, hoping. 

This is what happens in a world where not all is given the chance to live in dignity where NOT everyone has enough money to get the basic necessities they need to survive all year long.

The feelings of 'love' usually comes from 'giving help' which turns to feelings of 'uselessness, powerlessness and hopelessness' when one loses ones job or source of income.

That's why we created Santa Claus. That's why we call the ones who help us as 'Santa Claus' . 

So, we have to question our motive when we give gifts or when we give help. The question we want to ask ourselves is:

How can we give a REAL Gift that lasts?

We can live a life where we do not have to wait for Christmas to get gifts.

Expanding The Word 'Help'
To give assistance; where assistance is about the activity of contributing to that which is what life is about, giving ALL a dignified life, hence, be of service to life,realizing we are all parts of life that is birthed here and therefore equals - with equal opportunity to survive. 

Check the links below and see what 'The GIFT of LIFE' is: 

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