Realizing and Living My Utmost Potential Part 2: Food: Recreating Myself : Food Preparation

Recreating Myself
Life Support
Living Principles

Last Wednesday, I gave a Cooking Class.

I introduced myself to them and told them my story of how in the middle of my healthy eating craze, I was diagnosed with 4th stage breast cancer and my healing process, plus my food story:

From a vegetarian, vegan, raw foodist, fruitarian, and 'trying-hard breatharian' 

http://juneroca.com/mathematics-of-life/food-mathematics/my-food-programming/my-mind-patterns/

To someone who is now eating animal meat, vegetables, fruits etc.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NuTHEj8MNr4

I also shared with them what I saw in my food logs and blood sugar logs:

https://juneroca.selz.com/

I shared with them some of the things I saw in my investigation:
1. That my blood sugar shoots up after 2 hours of eating a plate of fruits. I used to eat a lot of fruits which changed now as I investigate how much sugar is in fruits. It's not a belief that i learned because someone said so - as a be-LIE-f. It is a product of my investigation. It is easy for the mind to imagine things someone said in the mind and inflate it, rather than use physical measurements.
https://juneroca.selz.com/items/detail/53605ac4a1416c15e495aca8

2. That vegetables also have sugar and carbohydrate content - which I did not see before when i was in a 'healthy eating craze' because i was looking through my mind's eyes - using my mind to inflate the value of fruits because of my fear of disease which is equal to fear of not being in control of my body. I did not see vegetables as what they are - as food, a substance used to nourish the body. I saw it as a cure - within the belief that If i eat vegetables, I will become healthy and my fear of dis-ease and death will be gone - an illusion of wholeness rather than real wholeness. I did not realize that I am fueling the fear of disease through my desire to be 'healthy' and eating the food that i desire. My belief that it was 'healthy' and my belief that the other food items not included in my diet is 'not healthy' - was reinforcing that.
https://juneroca.selz.com/items/detail/53613db0a1416c08280d151b

I saw that my belief that 'vegans and vegetarians attend only vegetarian or vegan cooking classes and will not attend cooking classes where there's meat in the kitchen, is just my own projection of my fears when i was in this 'healthy eating craze' - where i did not eat vegetarian food cooked in a pot where meat was cooked (which is me judging animals as not healthy and vegetables more healthy - a judgment that i forgave myself for and in the process of correcting myself).

There were  vegans and meat eaters in the class. There's cooked and raw food items in the kitchen and I talked to them about my sugar and my food logs.  I told them I am a health coach.

One girl asked me: So is this health?
I said, 'it depends what your definition of health is'. She left before I was able to tell her that health is not just absence of disease, or eating vegetables, fruits, superfoods or detoxing.

We have to make an investigation to find out if fear of sickness or disease is the starting point for why one is doing it or getting into it. First, if there is an intense desire to make oneself healthy, we have to identify the fear that can be fueling it, released through self-forgiveness and corrected. Most of it for me was fear of not being in control as I connected disease with not having control of my physical body and mind, and health is a condition where i am in control of my life. The fear then will do the very thing that we fear will happen to us when we have disease.

Health is overall wellness - physical, mental, and social alignment to what is best for all.

Animals and plants are not here to be judged like in a beauty competition or health competition, rather, to be acknowledged for being here to support the physical body's optimum survival through providing it nutrition.

This is my correction - how i changed from a raw food 'die-hard' un-cooking 'chef' to an 'All Diet I embrace all life' cooking and un-cooking 'chef'. I am in the process of self-perfection, so this is not the end but a journey to life

My starting point changed from 'what is good for me', to 'what is best for all'.

The process of 'mind deconstruction' (through self-forgiveness) started and the result is physically visible in my cooking classes. I am enjoying this expression.

There were concerns that this will not work in the beginning, but I pushed through my self-imposed mind limitations and gave the cooking class to correct my 'judgmental' outlook of what the 'healthy diet' is. It works! I had 10 attendees recently and it had been going on for 1 year:

Here are the Websites i've Put Them In:
Redefining Raw Food 
http://redefiningrawfood.wordpress.com/
Redefining Vegetarian Cooking
https://redefiningvegetariancooking.wordpress.com/
Redefining International Cuisine
https://redefininginternationalcuisine.wordpress.com/
Redefining Vegan Cooking
http://redefiningvegancooking.wordpress.com/

Here are some pics: 

The Nori Roll Cooking Class and Health Coaching

Cityscape Clubhouse

6467 Melody Ln.

Dallas, Tx

75231

June Roca

Phone: 972-251-0231

  To Like the Facebook Pages On The Left Side for Support, 

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Day 11 Raw Food : Raw and Cooked Apple: 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

http://budsoflife.org/sf-sugar

Physical  Support

Awareness of How Much Sugar We Take: The Sugar Log Project

http://sugarlog.budsoflife.org/

Physical Support

My Food and Recipes Blog
Relationship Support: Blogging with Partner
Leon's (My husband) 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar
Financial Support
https://juneroca.selz.com/
Life Support
Living Principles
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Apple Nutrition Video

http://budsoflife.org/apple

Looking at the nutrition information of Apples both raw and cooked and doing self-forgiveness for adopting a raw food diet (in 2008 in the middle of my healthy eating craze where I was diagnosed with cancer) because of fear of disease and the taste of food driving me without investigating the amount of nutrition in foods i eat like the apple and me directing myself what to eat...

Apple Nutrition Information Link for Both Raw and Cooked Apple:

http://foodandnutritionjunejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/06/day-11-apple-nutrition-raw-and-cooked.html

My Mind Pattern:

(2008)

>I fear disease

>I need to go into a healthy diet to make sure I will stay healthy 

>I heard raw food is a healthy diet

>I will adopt a raw food diet

What's the fear?
Fear of disease - angina 
( heart pain in my heart - I was diagnosed with this when i was in high school)

What is Self-forgiveness?

It is the process by which an individual forgives oneself for accepting and allowing self to separate from objective reality, releasing positive and negative value judgments such as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative - as subjective interpretations of reality regarding something or someone that leads to stability as breath. 

Writing Self-forgiveness Statements

 I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear having disease so desires to eat what I perceived as 'healthy food' - the 'raw food diet', believing that a raw apple is a lot more nutritious than a cooked apple - which is me believing what i heard from people eating raw food and watching videos from youtube, instead of investigating the nutrition information for raw apple and cooked apple which i am investigating in this blog right now, looking at the sugar content etc. and instead of testing my fasting blood sugar the next day to see if the amount of apple I am eating is indeed the amount that the body needs  in terms of sugar and other nutrients and looking also at how my fears and cravings in the mind can influence psychological stress,  that can lead to physical stress - forgiving myself and correcting myself in my use of words and my behavior, I just did what others did where i am directed by others definition of words rather than me giving words a definition based on how i changed in the way i live.

Commitment to Correct myself

I commit myself to when and as i see myself desiring to go into  a raw food diet after I watch videos in youtube - i stop - I breathe and see the common sense in investigating what raw food is about myself and looking at the amount of sugar I get from eating fruits and vegetables  based on taste to entertain my tongue to make myself believe this is the healthiest diet for me rather than see and understand I am running away from my fear of disease and running towards raw food to be healthy as a way to transcend my fear of disease - which is an illusion of wholeness rather than facing my fear of disease and look at the origin point so I can forgive and correct myself and see the memories I attached to the fear of disease - to be able to birth me within real wholeness - embracing all parts of me I separated myself from because of fear - being aware of the mind me and the physical me, and take self-responsibility for the consequence outflow I created in 'my within'  and 'my without'. 

I commit myself to expand and redefine the word 'raw food' as equal to my expression of how I changed. 

Why am I expanding or redefining words?

Words are like microchips that has in it for example, thoughts, imaginations etc. that is an interpretation of reality in our mind. It is defined within what is best for us, as individuals, which is based on competition within survival of the fittest . So, in expanding or redefining a word our goal is to align its meaning to what the word is in physical reality - which is mutually beneficial for all of us, humans, plants, animals etc. as it is what the word is, realizing that we can forgive ourselves for the meaning we gave it and correct ourselves - giving it a meaning we can live and express ourselves as, in physical reality that aligns to what is best for all -  as Living Words.

Word Web

Raw Foodist

A person who eat only or predominantly raw food

My expanded Definition

Raw Foodist

A person who eats only or predominantly raw food, consisting of raw fruits, vegetables, seeds and nuts that is heated at or below 118 degrees - where fruits, seeds, nuts, and vegetables are seen as part of the whole - that is life. Raw food is also cooked under the sun in essence as fruits and vegetables, are grown under the sun. Cooked or raw, food items are substances that provide nutrition for the body.

-

Here, I saw raw food as a way to transcend my fear of disease and death

defined according to the kind of food one eats (to be healthy - within fear of disease), rather than food as the nutrition one eats regardless if its from raw food or cooked food - judging raw or cooked food within bias and instead of seeing that disease is here (as the virus) as part of the whole - that is life, to show us what we cannot see so we can take self-responsibility for it. It is our fear of not being in control of our relationship with our body and mind that brings us to fear disease. Viruses or diseases are being regarded as an enemy and raw food becomes the weapon against the disease. We have to look at our fear of not being in control with regards to our relationship with our body and mind and see where our dislike for suffering and pain originated - ask ourselves when this fear started and the past memory we are living in the present. Instead of us being here as who we are as breath - in a body, working in harmony with our body, food and this physical existence, as parts of the whole - as life, it is being seen as separate from the whole and some parts of it are being judged. 

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Day 9 Living My Utmost Potential Part 1

Life Support

Living Principles

When I was young, I have lots of questions like 'who am I?'

This was what went on in my mind,

Mind Pattern:
>I do not know where I am
>Who created me?
>Why am I here?
>Who chose my mother and father for me?
>I have to survive even with no information about who i am?
>This is strange
>I feel disempowered
>my life is futile with no purpose
>I am uncertain this is a world that will not guarantee my survival
>So, I will just work my way through this uncertainty to survive
>Food is the one that I can depend on because my mom always cook what I want - the Philippine 'humba' (a sweet and sour pork dish with dried banana blossom)
>It is delicious because it has lots of sugar that makes it sweet
>It has vinegar that cuts through the sweetness
>the soft fleshy part with fat of the meat entertains my tongue

I was in my mind figuring things out.
I found out it is a matter of bringing me back here in physical reality and me changing, standing and living these principles that I stated that will define who I am, what I am, how I am etc..

There is fear of not surviving and fear of being in this world yet not knowing who i am, when I was a kid but i hid it within my mind and this fear fueled my desire for something that will give me power, life and energy.

Food was a source of entertainment, so it became my power source, my life source and my energy source - my primary source of survival.

My favorite dish was 'humba', a Filipino pork dish with vinegar, soy sauce, black pepper and lots of sugar, so I ate this dish that was cooked by my mom for me specifically. She used to ask me what I want for her to cook and that became my experience of 'love', and so I defined food within 'love' and 'family'.

When at times my mom had to go and attend a conference somewhere, my dad did not know how to cook, so he fed us this fried small dried fish called 'dilis' which i was not accustomed to because it has no taste, so I defined and attached food with a negative experience also.

These definitions create a conflict within myself because they were my mom and dad's definition of food that is used within bias, which I am using as my definition.

So, i am committing myself to redefining the word 'food' and in essence redefining myself - and is now in the process of living  the redefined definition.

From being a vegetarian, vegan, raw vegan, fruitarian etc., I am now eating all kinds of food and not limiting my food choices to any dietary restrictions. I realized that the solution is NOT in running away from food that I labeled as 'bad', but in releasing my fear of food that I believed as 'bad' and 'unhealthy' and so as I investigate my fears, release them and start seeing food as part of the whole - that is life, which I cannot judge or blame for making me feel bad and look bad or use to satisfy a craving, rather, an entity that is expressing here, birthed here - therefore my equal.

I have developed recipes that is not restricted to a certain diet but rather, created recipes out of what i eat that supported my body and can be eaten by others that needs recipes to support the body to survive which is part of the process of correcting my mind pattern which is about me seeing food as something that can satisfy my sweet or sugar craving and make me happy or blissful in the past. Here's my expanded definition of the word 'food':

I am doing investigation on sugar right now and I have just finished an e-book that is about what i eat with different recipes, where I lost 9 lbs. in the beginning and lost more as time goes by, which is not really about losing weight as a goal but rather a result of investigating my relationship with food after i stopped my 'healthy eating' craze where I saw my body having difficulty with movement because it was gaining weight. I realized food is not to blame. It is not about going from one diet to another but releasing our fears, the memories we connect them to, expanding and redefining words as equal to our expression of how we changed and having a self-intimate relationship with the body and all that is here which I am in the process of living.

I realized that when I write recipes it has to be something that is a part of my self-investigation process and correcting my relationship with food. It is not about just writing recipes that taste good and look good that appeals to those who crave food and recipes that taste good and look good because when we do that we project our limited definitions of ourselves - as our fears and cravings to food.

What's interesting is that I found out weight loss, weight gain and weight maintenance is not what I believed it to be. It is a number that we either deify or hide because of what we will get from it like us either becoming or perceiving ourselves as fit or fat - to be validated by others or within fear that we will be invalidated by them. I used the weighing scale as a reference point.

To show what i found out, I will have to use these numbers but they are not here to be deified or hidden because of a belief or judgment, they are here for us to use in whatever we do that will benefit all, same thing with my blood glucose or sugar readings.

I am uncovering many things in my investigation that does not support the belief systems I had when I was vegetarian, vegan, a raw foodist etc. and it is very interesting to see how I have changed from being in one corner of the earth eating only vegetables and at one time not eating and drinking (for 3 and 1/2 days) to seeing vegetables, fruits and animal meat as my equals living this one life and talking about not judging or blaming them as part of my self-correction in my self-perfection process. I enjoy that a lot.

Recently, i have prepared a no salt grass-fed beef burger and i have eaten it and I accepted and allowed myself to experience the taste of the beef without any added taste. That was an awakening for me and a realization: We have to experience the taste of beef as it is. We have to stop using food for entertainment. There's a lot to explore in this area where we can expand ourselves.

Today, I have created a cake and ate it with ground pork as a side and some creamed cauliflower. I will talk more about that when I finished putting together the recipe.

I realized that the utmost potential is not something that can be measured in terms of a 'superlative degree' because we are here as equals but rather, I see it as a possibility of developing an equal and one relationship with all that is here in 'my within' and 'my without' in this life and the next, to stand for what is best for all life - in all ways, which I am in the process of living.


I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear not having information and knowledge about who i am, what I am, how I am, when, why, and where I am believing that i cannot survive in a world where i do not have a story, an identity based on the uniqueness of me as an individual separate from all, so desiring to know and have information about who made me, what am i made of, how was i made, when was i made and why was i made, believing that if I know these things i can better live and express myself here, instead of seeing and realising that i am here as breath in every moment, yet i am in my mind asking and searching for answers rather than live as who i am here as the breath.

Through this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i have to have a purpose and that if i have none, I am disempowered, and it is futile living in this world without a purpose.

Through this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame this world for not guaranteeing my survival instead of seeing and realizing that i have to take self-responsibility and assist in creating a world that truly honors life by blogging about solutions for change endorsing LIG

Through this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to cope rather than assist in creating effective change in this world - working my way through the uncertainty  rather than change and stand for what is best for all - mutually benefitting all. 

Through this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to use food to cope with the uncertainty in this world rather than use food as what it is - a substance that nourish the body.

Through this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mom loves me because she cooks me my favorite 'humba' dish using the  sweet and sour pork stew called  'humba' as object for my entertainment - something that will entertain my tongue within its soft gelatinous texture, sweet and sour taste,and the soft texture of its flesh, instead of seeing and realizing that this is food and therefore it should be used as  such. 

I commit myself to expand and redefine the word 'humba' as equal to my story of how i change


Humba
Sugar braised pork dish, where the pork ad the sugar is given a value equal to life

Phonology  (Sounding words)
From
HUM BA-by
To
HUM B-ody A-ll nourished

Here are Some of The Links For Perspective:

21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

http://budsoflife.org/sf-sugar

Physical  Support

Awareness of How Much Sugar We Take: The Sugar Log Project

http://sugarlog.budsoflife.org/

Physical Support

My Food and Recipes Blog
Relationship Support: Blogging with Partner
Leon's (My husband) 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar Blogs
Financial Support
https://juneroca.selz.com/

Life Support

Living Principles

Day 8 Fullness : Korean 'Bibimbap': 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

http://budsoflife.org/sf-sugar

Physical  Support

Awareness of How Much Sugar We Take: The Sugar Log Project

http://sugarlog.budsoflife.org/

Physical Support

My Food and Recipes Blog
Relationship Support: Blogging with Partner
Leon's (My husband) 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar Blogs
Financial Support
https://juneroca.selz.com/
Life Support
Living Principles
===
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DAILY NEWS Brussels, Belgium

Eating Bibimbap at a Korean Place...

Mind Pattern

>I am full
>I ate too much of the dish 
>It was delicious
>But I cannot eat more food because my stomach is full
>I feel satisfied but my stomach is in pain

What's the fear?
Fear of getting too full 

What is Self-forgiveness?

It is the process by which an individual forgives oneself for accepting and allowing self to separate from objective reality, releasing positive and negative value judgments such as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative - as subjective interpretations of reality regarding something or someone that leads to stability as breath. 

Writing Self-forgiveness Statements:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear eating too much - being too full, where I am satisfied but at the same time feeling uncomfortable or feeling my stomach is in pain when full- so desiring to have an extra stomach where i can fit everything in so I can eat more of the tasty foods available in the food court, believing that food is to be enjoyed and that it is here to give me pleasure and as such, i have to partake food from the best restaurants prepared by famous chefs in the planet - where I blame the physical universe for not giving me a lot of money to make that a reality and blame my body for not creating a bigger stomach so i can enjoy more food and be entertained by food - where my desire is directing me rather than see what food is- a substance that is used to nourish the body and not a substance that will entertain me. I realized enjoying its taste expression is okay, but not to abuse it to the point where food is being prepared to taste according to my desires - manipulating its taste, smell and texture for me to be entertained, forgetting what food really is in the process. Through this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not even be aware of how much sugar is in one fruit, and therefore not aware of how much sugar is in all the fruits I ate combined when i was fruitarian - which was a lot, and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear being unaware of whether the fruits will spike my blood sugar because I did not care about the body, I only cared about me feeling good about my diet rather than seeing through the veil and questioning why I am judging vegetables and animals as less than fruits instead of seeing that Life is about standing for what is best for all.

Commitment To Correct Myself

I commit myself to when and as I see myself fear being full, bloated and uncomfortable - I stop and breathe. I bring myself back here in physical reality, look at the foods i eat, log it, and see the changes in my log, my weight, my blood sugar, test the portions of food items I eat, work with the body and re-learn how to eat from a starting point of nutrition.

I commit myself to when I see myself unaware of the nutrition in the food I eat - I investigate what food is about, look up the nutrition information of the food item I eat and educate myself realizing that fruits and all food items are not my slave but my equal, so in gratefulness, come to know them through the nutrition that is in them, without judging one as better than others and during my free time(1 once a week), come to know their origin and how they arrive on my table.

I commit myself to assist in creating a life where all can afford to buy food to nourish the body.

I commit myself to expand and redefine the word 'full' as equal to how I change in my starting point when eating

Why am I expanding or redefining words?

Words are like microchips that has in it for example, thoughts, imaginations etc. that is an interpretation of reality in our mind. It is defined within what is best for us, as individuals, which is based on competition within survival of the fittest . So, in expanding or redefining a word our goal is to align its meaning to what the word is in physical reality - which is mutually beneficial for all of us, humans, plants, animals etc. as it is what the word is, realizing that we can forgive ourselves for the meaning we gave it and correct ourselves - giving it a meaning we can live and express ourselves as, in physical reality that aligns to what is best for all -  as Living Words.

Word Web
Full
Filled to satisfaction with food or drink

My Expanded Definition:
Full
Filled to satisfaction with food and drink
-
Here the satisfaction is a mind satisfaction based on how much entertainment I had while eating the food or while drinking instead of nutrition satisfaction where the body is physically satisfied that it got the nutrition it needs to survive.

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Day 6 Lamb Meat: 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

Mental Health Support

21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar

http://budsoflife.org/sf-sugar

Physical  Support

Awareness of How Much Sugar We Take: The Sugar Log Project

http://sugarlog.budsoflife.org/

Physical Support

My Food and Recipes Blog
Relationship Support: Blogging with Partner
Leon's (My husband) 21 Days Mind Investigation on Sugar Blogs
Financial Support
https://juneroca.selz.com/
Life Support
Living Principles
http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2014/05/the-desteni-of-living-my-declaration-of_30.html
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Mind Pattern:

>I don't like the smell of this smoked lamb chops
>but i need protein
>and i am tired of eating pork and beef every day
>I need a change
>meat does not have carbohydrates so it does not raise the blood sugar level
>and I have already paid for this
>so i better eat this

What's the fear?

Fear of eating lamb which I perceived as having a foul smell

What is Self-forgiveness?

It is the process by which an individual forgives oneself for accepting and allowing self to separate from objective reality, releasing positive and negative value judgments such as good or bad, right or wrong, positive or negative - as subjective interpretations of reality regarding something or someone that leads to stability as breath. 

Writing my Self-forgiveness

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear eating lamb believing that the smell of it is offensive where within this I am blaming the lamb for expressing as that smell and projecting my own self-judgment of how I judge myself within smell from my mind based on smell where I judged it as either pleasant or unpleasant- good or bad - where I attached this fear of bad smell to a memory of me smelling goat meat when I was young believing it smells bad and when I was older desire the taste of it so much so that I ignore its smell, and through this, I forgive myself to eat the lamb believing meat does not raise the blood glucose levels - where I am controlling the sugar levels through eating protein- through this, I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to fear not eating protein believing that I will die if I do not eat protein or get a disease - within fear of having a disease and fear of death - instead of realizing the bacteria and viruses are here to show us what we do not take self-responsibility for so we can face it and do something about it. Through this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear wasting money and fear wasting food, so eat the lamb from the starting point of fear saying 'I already paid for it' rather than eat for nourishment.

Commitment for Self-Correction

I commit myself to rather than eat from the starting point of smell, waste and money, eat from a starting point of nutrition and take time to look at what food really is and look up the nutrition in foods I eat and log what foods I eat daily to be aware of what i am giving my body in terms of nourishment.



I commit myself to when and as i see myself get tired of eating same thing everyday, look at what food is all about and eat from that starting point rather than based on taste - realizing that the food has to have a taste that can aid in swallowing the food so it can be digested and the nutrition distributed to all parts of the body 

I commit myself to expand the words 'lamb' and 'smell' to what is best for all and express myself equal to the redefined meaning of this word 

Why am I expanding or redefining words?

Words are like microchips that has in it for example, thoughts, imaginations etc. that is an interpretation of reality in our mind. It is defined within what is best for us, as individuals, which is based on competition within survival of the fittest . So, in expanding or redefining a word our goal is to align its meaning to what the word is in physical reality - which is mutually beneficial for all of us, humans, plants, animals etc. as it is what the word is, realizing that we can forgive ourselves for the meaning we gave it and correct ourselves - giving it a meaning we can live and express ourselves as, in physical reality that aligns to what is best for all -  as Living Words.

Word Web
Lamb
The flesh of a young domestic sheep eaten as food

Goat
Any of numerous agile ruminants related to sheep but having a beard and straight horns

Smell
The sensation that results when olfactory receptors in the nose are stimulated by particular chemicals in gaseous form

My Expanded Definition:

Lamb
The flesh of a young domestic sheep - that is part of the whole - that is Life

Goat
Any of the numerous agile ruminants that is related with the sheep but having a beard and straight horns - that is part of the whole - that is Life

Smell
The sensation that results when olfactory receptors in the nose are stimulated by particular chemicals in gaseous form - where the sensation is not attached to a mind value based from beliefs, judgments etc. but rather as a physical sensation.

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This is a holographic universe.

What we create in 'our within' - as the mind is what we create in 'our without' as this world system.

In my previous blog, i talked about creating war within our mind through desiring peace, which is really running away from what we fear - which is war, death etc., thereby creating a polarity equation.

The same friction and conflict that exist within our mind is the same friction and conflict that exist in 'our without'  - as this world system

I am taking self-responsibility by doing self-forgiveness and correcting my expression in my living.

Here's my self-forgiveness statements:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the design of
fear of survival - as the physical/body - as energy - as money

Fear death, guns and violence when watching war movies
believing that i should not see this violence and death going on around me
which i connected to the sound of gunshot i heard when i was young outside
my grandmother's house when a family member was shot by a policeman
which gave me a negative experience - so connected gunshots to that

So, Desiring only to see movies about people who are alive and  happy
which i connected to the laughter we share as a family
while we exchange stories in our house
which gives me a positive feeling - a feeling of winning
which i associated with life and living
not realizing that love is life
and that life is about standing as what is best for all
and creating a world that truly honors life

Within this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to
fear seeing corpses that are stiff and not moving
believing that while i am looking at them they might move and talk
and strangle me to death having seen movies about zombies who do that
so desiring to only see people who are happy and alive and movies about them
believing that they will not be a threat to my safety because they will not want to kill me

Within this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to
fear getting sick and going to the hospital fears seeing open wounds
and people suffering in pain
projecting this into myself
so desires to be healthy so i will not suffer in pain
instead of realizing that i interpreted suffering within my mind
and have given it a negative value
so i have to release the energy i associated to it
and stabilize me as breath when going to the hospital
when and as i see people in pain

Through this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to doubt who i am perceiving that
i split myself into 2 the one who is Not fearing death, guns and torture in movies
and the one who is fearing death, guns and torture in movies
instead of realizing the body dies and goes back to the dust but i remain as who i am here

Through this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame the physical
for creating death instead of realizing that it is me who has given death a value less than life
then reacting to movies depicting people who gun down each other, torture each other etc.
and so it is me who is taking self-responsibility by releasing the mind value i have given to it
within this, also realizing that the movies are produced for the purpose of making money
through impulsing ones fears so stabilizing myself as breath and releasing the energy as i breathe out when and as i watch movies or any kind of media

Through this i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to have the excuse
that i need to survive as the personality who fears death, torture and violence
instead of realizing that life is not about surviving through a positive mind view of life
by interpreting reality
Life is about facing the problems in society
providing real solutions
and creating a world that truly honors life
where the poor, elderly, uneducated, unemployed etc.
are given a means to get the basic necessities to survive in dignity
a Basic/Living Income Guaranteed from birth to death
creating a balanced ecosystem of money
that truly sustains life

Through this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to
justify the excuse that i have to survive as a personality
who fears death, torture and violence and so does not want to watch war movies or
stories about torture and violence
believing that that is how i can transcend my fear of death
which i interpreted as being whole
instead of realizing that that is balance in polarity
where i create an illusion of peace within my mind
instead of creating real peace by assisting in creating a world
where all can survive and see the commonsense in
giving a Basic/Living Income Guarantee

I commit myself to show that we need to stop mind participation and create a world that truly honors life to be able to live a life of real happiness otherwise we all lose

I commit myself  to show that we live in every moment and that we have to take every moment to change ourselves and so, this world

I commit myself to show that to make a better world all of us have to take self-responsibility for what we create 'within and without'. Blaming will not change anything.

War With Syria: We Create War Within Our Mind Through Fearing War So Creating It In Our 'Without'

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War with Syria Series

Do we really create war?

Who else is creating all that is here but all of us who are here?

We are creating it again and again. Otherwise, it won't be here repeating itself again and again.

I am taking self-responsibility to stop this creation in 'my within' - as the mind

recognizing the inter-connectedness of life in 'our within and our without' and

correct myself in my living.

Here's my self-forgiveness statements:

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to participate in the design of fear of survival - as war  - as the body - as energy - as sound

Fear War - so Desiring Peace through using relaxation techniques like meditation, yoga exercises and other relaxation exercises like pilates, tai chi, qi gong manipulating the body to relax -believing life is about a peaceful body, mind and spirit where the body is separate from the mind and spirit and trying to unite the 3 - in separation from life, instead of realizing life is about  developing an equal and one relationship with all parts of life - including all parts of the body - standing equal to the mind so one can see how one created oneself 'within and without' so one can take responsibility for and as all life - stopping mind participation and birthing oneself as life within self- body- living

Within this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to have peace of mind, where i imagine a peaceful scene within my mind with the guru on top of my head in a certain pose blessing me and a savior that can save me from my sins believing that peace is about one being superior and one being inferior, like a relationship that exist between a victim and a savior in separation from each other and then Desiring to unite/'be one with' to be liberated from the bondage of birth and death - which in essence is Desiring to not take self-responsibility for the consequence that i have accepted and allowed in this world not realizing that this is self-realization within self-interest which does not align to oneness and equality but just a belief that transcending ones fear can happen by someone saving me from sin or someone perceived to be superior (made of the same substance = dust of the earth) can liberate me from a life of self-interest where i am perceived inferior, where i believed expanding ones mind , and singing the sanskrit word,  ' 'babanam kevalam' which means 'love is all there is' will help give me liberation -  not even questioning this fuzzy logic, but blindly surrendering myself to someone perceived 'greater than' self - where love is a feeling that i imagine to fill this earth and everyone in it - not realizing that the poor needs to eat 3x a day and that no matter how many times i meditate, sing, feed the poor, the system of inequality will not change because it's all about money and profit and that cooperatives which was suggested by my guru then will not work because it is coping within a system of abuse based on inequality and not about REAL change  within creating a balanced ecosystem of money to sustain Life on earth

Within this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to support this current system that creates a cycle of abuse that i do not even see - just because of wanting to transcend the chaos in my mind which i created through the friction and conflict of polarized thinking. I believed then that being relaxed within a mind idea of peace will make a peaceful world - not realizing that i created the chaos in my mind and i am trying to create peace in my mind - where peace is imaginary peace and not real peace which is creating an idea of balance within balance in polarity, NOT REAL BALANCE in a balanced ecosystem which is life sustaining.

It is perpetually/repeatedly creating a system of abuse - creating friction and conflict 'within and without', instead of creating a world that truly honors life and walking as equals and giving the poor, the uneducated, the elderly etc. a means to have a dignified life by giving a Basic/Living Income Guaranteed from birth to death - i would settle for just giving them alms or cooking food for a select few but NOT ALL LIFE- where within wanting liberation for oneself from bondage, one becomes BOUND to ones own selfish desire to liberate oneself while all remain victims of abuse in a world of inequality.

This is the friction and conflict that i participated in for 29 years in 'my within' as the mind' - running away from fear of death/survival/limitation so satisfying my Desire for peace/bliss/ perceived eternal life (in other words, I would say my desire for peace, bliss, and perceived eternal life instead of putting slashes) which is an illusion as it is an interpretation of reality as the alternate version of me in an alternate reality within my mind,

Where, if i was self-honest, i will see that i hated to look at the inequality in this world- the poverty and suffering around me and instead of facing it i retreated and created a beautiful place within my mind -not seeing that the mind works in polarity so creating a polarized world where the rich becomes richer and the poor becomes poorer- creating a consequence outflow in 'my without' as war, death, poverty, porn, abuse, crime and the opposite polarity of  which is perceived peace, perceived beauty, perceived happiness, perceived bliss, the elite etc., all of which are created from the same fears and desires. 

The same friction and conflict that arise from running away from my FEAR of SURVIVAL, my fear of war,  my fear of death, my fear of sickness, my fear of pain, my fear of suffering etc. and satisfying my DESIRE TO SURVIVE, my desire for peace, my desire to be relaxed, my desire for bliss, my desire for pleasure, my desire for eternal life, my desire for happiness, my desire for entertainment etc. All are equally creating a cycle of abuse.

The irony of it all is that what i was doing then was keeping myself from realizing self - as ALL LIFE within self-interest.

Self-sabotaging self within an idea of Liberating Self

Instead of realizing that

i am here as the breath in every moment

moving me, directing me

as who i am, what i am, how i am, when i am, where i am

equal to all that is birthed in this world

consisting of the same substance, the dust of the earth

stopping conflict and friction in 'my within' as the mind

and stopping the creation of it in 'my without' as this world system

moment by moment

breath by breath

where real peace is about birthing oneself as someone

that can be trusted to stand for what is best for all life

and creating a world that is best for all

developing an equal and one relationship with the physical/body

through movement,

 standing equal to the mind

and standing equal to the spirit of LIFE

which includes creating a balanced ecosystem of money

that sustains life

Through this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself

to blame the physical/body for being stressed

instead of realizing i created stress through reacting to the fear

and the body reacting to that

so it is me who is taking self-responsibility

in stopping mind participation and correcting myself in my living

Through this i forgive myself that i have

accepted and allowed myself to have the excuse that i have

to survive as a peaceful personality

trying to satisfy my desire to be peaceful

instead of realizing this is balance in polarity

where i try to run away from my fear

instead of facing it, walking back and seeing where it all started

and that instead of creating a polarity equation in my mind

by trying to avoid fear and desiring peace

we have to look at the problems we have on this earth

and provide a solution where all survive

where the resources given by the earth are nationalized

and the profit used to

create dividends sufficient enough

to cover a Basic/Living Income

for the poor, the unemployed, the elderly, the uneducated etc.

realizing that these resources are given to us all equally by the earth

so we have to create a sustainable system

where there's a balanced ecosystem of money

on earth

Through this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to

justify the excuse that i have to survive as a personality that desires peace

believing this way i become whole

where wholeness is an idea that i created within my mind

creating mental peace to transcend my fear of war within my mind

instead of creating and supporting the establishment of real peace

Real peace being

PE-ople as A-ll C-aring about each other as E-quals

where all are walking

as equals in this one life

and paving the way for that

where the poor, the unemployed, the elderly

or the ones who are illiterate or have little or no education

has means of getting the basic necessities they need to live a dignified life

where the resources given by the earth are nationalized

and the profit used to

create dividends sufficient enough

to cover a Basic/Living Income

creating a sustainable system

where there's a balanced ecosystem of money

on earth

I commit myself to show that real peace is possible if we all take self-responsibility in changing in 'our within' and 'our without using tools that work

I commit myself to walk back and look at the origin of my fears

I commit myself to when and as i see myself desiring to do something to relax

I stop

I breath and change my starting point from self-interest

within trying to get a positive energy experience in whatever exercises i do

to that which will benefit all life - which is doing exercises

 as the breath here