2012: Mother Blog: Letter To My Mom Part 1 Day 32

I am grateful to be given an opportunity to birth me here in the physical.

I am writing about my process of rebirth, where i recreate myself  - changing me here in this physical- looking at all my beliefs, judgments etc. and how i see me and others based from those - looking at definitions of words  - redefining words - so i can direct them here  - as i take self-responsibility for/as me.

So, instead of speaking about the 'relationship' - based on the belief that i am separate from her/you, i will write about what is here, my process of rebirth - not coming out from my mother's/your body but - a rebirth - where i look at how i limited myself and direct who i have become - using self-forgiveness and daily self correction - to assist me here to recreate me as one and equal as my mom/as all- and as i recreate me - i recreate all parts of me - my DNA, my relationships etc.- as life - as i correct me in every moment - i deconstruct the personality patterns that enslave me as the personality- and recreate a new self that can always be trusted to stand for what is best for all life.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when my mother gave birth to me - i damaged my mother's body and suck the nutrients/life in her body - so that i may live in self-interest based on survival - and within this - i forgive myself that i throughout my existence in this physical body continue sucking the life support from my mother - so that i may live

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that i have to stop sucking life from her as the ego-personality defined by my fear of death - within this i forgive myself  that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see that asking her for life support - is me fearing death of me as the personality - where i constantly need a source of life - separate from me - which is my mother - as i believed she gave me life and without her i would die.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that i am here in every moment of breath - and it is because of my separation from all parts of me as life - that i feel alone, helpless and dying - so needed for someone/my mother - to be always at my beck and call - so that she may save me from my perceived helplessness and death - within this, i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that when i want my mother to save me and give me life - i am coming from a starting point of lack of life - which in essence is death - as i identify as the limited ego-personality defined by life and death - not realizing that i am here in every moment - and that i am able to take self-responsibility for me and direct me to support me in this world to birth me as life - so that i will not abuse my mom and need her to save me - as i am able to birth me here to stand eternally as life with or without a form.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to believe that i am  an individual separate from all - not realizing that i am part of all that exist- as we are made from the same substance all are made of

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that i belong to a 'bigger family' that is composed of humans, animals, plants etc.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that i am a copy of my mom and dad as i downloaded the codes from their genes in my DNA.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that what i like or dislike about my mom or dad and what i want them to change - so that i can feel better about myself - are points i can direct within myself - because i am self-responsible in my own world

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see that the entire monetary system as it currently is - is based on the same point - sucking life from each other as the elite enrich themselves while the rest of the population suffers - as money and goods are unequally distributed - and like a body that survives from the nutrients coming from the blood- as the main organ - the heart suffers - as the earth suffers - because it gives to everyone equally - while human's greed support inequality - so some organs survive and some dies - and within this inequality - the body is slowly going to die - as this world is dying right now - collapsing.

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not see that if i am the change - and if i do not change the world doesn't change

I commit myself  to writing a blog for 7 yrs about the abuse that i support and expose the abuse of others - so that this blog will stand as a proof for others to see that taking self-responsibility starts in writing a blog -  writing oneself to freedom/change - using self-forgiveness and self-correction - until we birth a world that will honor life equally.

I commit to through writing self-forgiveness and moment to moment self- correction  - assist myself to birth me here as life - listening to interviews that talk about how  this world came about, how  my body and mind functions as a system etc. - using all the life tools that is available for me - and will not stop until all are free - until a world that truly honors life based on equality exist forevermore.