'I Want To Do Something Now!' Day 187 Postponement Character fear Dimension 2

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SELF-FORGIVENESS

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This is a continuation of this Blog

http://junejourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/10/what-to-do-when-bored-shoulders-are.html

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how i still, place my wants needs and desires before physical, reality responsibility that will determine my relationship to me, others and my future in this world - in this utilizing the postponement character as a means to justify 'making myself feel better' for placing my wants and desires before physical practical responsibility where i as the postponement character initiate the reactions of fear of missing out/losing out on that something else - event - if i place responsibility before my want and needs and so allows myself to manipulate myself with fear in relationship to my wants and needs instead of being here, stable in/as breath qne doing things that needs to be done.

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how i would still, to this day, with facing a responsibility, blame the education system, my teachers, parents or even the responsibility itself  as taking away from me the fulfillment of my wants and needs in moments in time where i know i have to tend to responsibilities but wants to satisfy my wants, desires and needs first - and so will blame education, assignment, teachers, professors, parents - anything/anyone i can blame/exert my own inner conflict to, as i know what i am accepting and allowing that i am angry and frustrated with myself in this inner battle between my wants, needs and desires and the responsibilities or tasks that is here before me

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to blame everything/everyone else for 'taking away' my opportunities/time to satisfy my wants, needs and desires  - where i justify me satisfying my wants before tending to the practical physical reality responsibilities

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how i still from childhood hold onto this relationship or conflict with time and the here of my world/ reality within the relationship to responsibility - as i still from childhood place my wants before my life in this world and reality

I forgive myself that i haven't accepted and allowed myself to see, realise and understand how we've created this world system - this entire entertainment world - which is the postponement world system - with its prerogative entertaining and catering to the wants and needs of humans - the entire living condition of 'i want it now' - that which money can buy - where humans  place their wants and desires before their responsibility to humanity and this world as a whole - facing the consequences of placing wants and needs before what is here as our responsibility to this physical existence - establishing real solutions to manifest a heaven on earth where there's physical balance between preference and responsibility - instead of a minority satisfying my wants and desires in the expense of the rest of humanity and this physical existence


I commit myself to assist me to no more accept and allow the fear of missing out on my wants to overpower and control me in moments of facing reponsibility - as i see and realise i am not really missing out on anything  - this indicate that i need to sort out my definition/priorities regarding what responsibility is in fact in relationship to myself. my world and my future within it

I commit myself to stop blaming others for the responsibilities i require doing, stop placing my wants before reality as the physical that is real and get into the grips of reality - realising that nothing can change unless i get my priorities straight - in seeing that whatever  i see in my mind is not real if it exist at the sacrifice of humanity with the wants i possess  in my life through money and money's relationship to humanity and this existence as a whole.

I commit myself to instead of satisfying my wants and desires - stand and decide for what is best for all

I commit myself to through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application - stop the memories, as pictures, desires  etc.  within and as myself and let go of the separation within and as myself and stand with the physical in every breath that i take.